Cedar Valley News
May 20, 2026
The Deal a Publisher Made With His Plumber
By Lars Olson
A customer told me something last week, and I have been turning it over ever since.
He is a publisher. He told me about a deal he has with his plumber. The way he tells it: he does not publish books, and I do not fix leaks. The plumber comes when called. The bill is what the bill is. Nobody has talked the other out of a dollar.
I laughed, because I have been watching some version of the deal walk past my counter for forty-one years, and I have never heard it said so cleanly.
I want to be careful. I run a hardware store. My best customer is the man or woman going to try the job themselves. I want them in the aisles, coming back next Saturday for the next thing. Nothing I am about to say is meant to chase one of them out the door.
But forty-one years teach a man to see something. A survey of 1,700 homeowners last year found that 58% spent more on a do-it-yourself job than they had planned. More than a third of the damaged jobs cost $500 or more to fix the fix. It is the part the YouTube video does not mention.
Here is what I have learned to see when a customer comes in with a part on the counter. I am not looking at the part. I am looking at two things about the job, and one about the customer.
The first is whether the mistake will be visible. Trim cut wrong. A faucet washer set wrong. A porch board in the wrong joist. You see it the same day, fix it the same afternoon. The cost is the part and an hour of your time. I cheer these on. Most of what I sell is for jobs like these, and most of what gets fixed in Cedar Valley is fixed by the person who lives there.
The second is whether the mistake will be hidden. Hidden mistakes do not announce themselves the day you make them. They wait. Electrical inside a wall. Plumbing inside a wall. Gas anything. Anything structural. The cost is not the part. The cost is what you find three months later, behind the wall, when the water has been running where it should not have been running.
The one thing about the customer is simpler. I am asking whether they have done one like it before. Not the same job. One like it. The difference between the man who fixes the leak in twenty minutes and the man who turns it into a four-hundred-dollar bill is rarely smarts. It is reps. The tenth time you sweat a pipe joint, you do it right. Nobody is good at the first one. The honest question is not can you do this. It is have you done one like it.
When the job is a visible-mistake job, and the customer has done one like it, I send them home with the part and a smile. When the job is a hidden-mistake job, and the customer has not, I find a way to say so without saying so. Sometimes I succeed. Sometimes I see them in two weeks with a sheepish look and the parts for the second attempt.
The publisher has done his own math. His time is worth more on a page than under a sink. He may be right. He may also be a man who tried it once and learned. I did not ask. The deal he made is the same deal a good carpenter makes with his accountant, and a farmer makes with his veterinarian. He does not do the other man’s work. The other man does not do his. The bill, when it comes, is what the bill is.
I am not telling you to call the plumber. I am telling you what I look at when you come to my counter. The fact of my watching does not mean I am judging. It means I want you to win.
Tell us on the Facebook page about a job which went well, or one which did not.
Cedar Valley News has a Facebook group. If you have comments and want to join the conversation, you are welcome. Tell us about the repair you fixed yourself, or the one you wish you had called for. https://bit.ly/40p8jKy
This editorial is part of the fictional Cedar Valley News series, written by Evan Swensen, Publisher, and Claude Marshall, AI Developmental Editor. While the people and town of Cedar Valley are fictional, the survey findings on do-it-yourself project costs and damage referenced in this editorial are real.

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Correction:
This is Publication Consultants’ motivation for constantly striving to assist authors sell and market their books. ACM is Publication Consultants’ plan to accomplish this so that our authors’ books have a reasonable opportunity for success. We know the difference between motion and direction. ACM is direction! ACM is the process for authors who are serious about bringing their books to market. ACM is a boon for serious authors, but a burden for hobbyist. We don’t recommend ACM for hobbyists.

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Mosquito Books has a new location in the Anchorage international airport and is available for signings with 21 days notice. Jim Misko had a signing there yesterday. His signing report included these words, “Had the best day ever at the airport . . ..”



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